Books
Parenting
Dorothy Corkville Briggs; Your Child’s Self-Esteem.
-A guide to understand and support the development of healthy self-esteem in young children.
Tamar Chansky; Freeing Your Child From Anxiety.
-An excellent starting point for understanding and addressing anxious disorders, including compulsive behaviors, in children.
Foster Cline and Jim Fay; Parenting with Love and Logic.
-A standard on utilizing natural consequences to teach children responsibly and avoid power struggles.
Ross W. Greene; The Explosive Child.
-A resource for understanding and helping children who struggle with inflexibility, anger and ‘meltdowns.’
Mary Sheedy Kurcinka; Raising Your Spirited Child.
-A helpful, supportive book for parents of children who are more intense, energetic and sensitive.
Mitchell H. Messer; Managing Anger: A Handbook of Proven Techniques. Highly recommended for assisting children and teens.
Thomas W. Phelan; 1-2-3 Magic.
-Another helpful book on effectively disciplining children ages 2-12. This resource is also available as a video/DVD.
Carolyn Webster-Stratton; The Incredible Years.
-Sometimes hard to find, this is an excellent book on dealing with behavioral issues in children ages 3-8.
Attachment Issues
Richard J. Delaney; The Healing Power of the Family.
-Describes the relationship patterns and issues experienced by child and family in foster or adoptive homes. Includes many helpful real-life stories.
Daniel Hughes; Facilitating Developmental Attachment.
-Hughes is a leader in the field. This book is helpful for both professionals and caregivers.
Kathleen Keating; The Hug Therapy Book.
-A collection of skills and techniques to assist in developing healthy attachment.
Sexual Compulsivity and Addiction
Understanding Sexual Addiction
Patrick Carnes; Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction, 3rd Ed.
-The classic primer on sexual compulsivity and addiction.
Patrick Carnes; Don’t Call It Love: Recovery from Sexual Addiction.
-Outlines the course of recovery from initial discovery to new growth. Includes many helpful true stories.
Marnie Ferree; No Stones.
-About women healing from sexual addiction.
Mark Laaser; Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction.
-Unwanted
Jay Stringer
-Worthy of her trust
Jason Martinkus
-Another very good primer on sexual addiction written from a Christian viewpoint.
Rob Weiss; Cruise Control.
-Understanding sex addiction in gay men.
William Struthers; Wired for Intimacy.
-An understanding of brain chemistry and reactivity to sexual stimulation. Written from a Christian perspective.
Claudia Black; Deceived.
-A guide to recovery for female partners of sex addicts from a leader in the field.
Barbara Steffens; Your Sexually Addicted Spouse
-The trauma model in treating partners cope and heal from their loved ones sexual addiction.
Richard Blakenship; Spouses of Addicts Recovery and Healing, Hope for the journey
Francoise Mastroianni;Spouses of Addicts Recovery and Healing, Hope for the journey, Workbook
-A book and workbook to help the partner heal from the trauma of sexual addiction, along with personal stories, and assignments in the workbook that are expereintial and somaticatically oriented.
Internet
Patrick Carnes, David Delmonico, Elizabeth Griffin; In the Shadows of the Net, 2nd ed.
- A powerful book describing compulsive online sexual behavior and how to address it.
Includes exercises to aid in recovery.
Wendy Maltz and Larry Maltz; The Porn Trap.
-Addresses addiction to pornography.
Jennifer Schneider, Robert Weiss; Cybersex Exposed.
-Geared toward the reader who is evaluating their degree of obsession or compulsion.
Helpful evaluation and recovery exercises included.
Nancy E. Willard; Cyber-Safe Kids, Cyber-Savvy Teens.
-A positive book on addressing internet issues with children and adolescents.
Couples
John Gottman; The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.
-A direct and helpful way to look at and improve the marriage relationship.
Sue Johnson; Hold Me Tight.
-A breakthrough understanding of marital conflict based in the need for a secure, accepting relationship.
“Cuts to the chase” for many couples with years of struggle.
Terrance Real; The New Rules of Marriage.
-What you need to know to make love work.
Willard HarleyJr ; Surviving an Affair,
-Guides you step by step from the devastating blow of Infidelity to a Loving and Trusting Marriage
Emmerson Eggrichs; Love and Respect,
-The Love She Most Desires, The Respect He Desperately Needs.
Linda Dillow and Lorrain Pintus; Intimate Issues,
-21 Staightforward Anwers to Questions most Frequently asked by Christian Women on the Topic of Sex.
-Marion Solomon, Stan Tatkin; Love and War
-An intergration of neuroscience, attachment theory and relational psychotherapy
-Hold me Tight, Suesan Johnson
-7 Desires of the Heart, Mark and Debbie Laaser
Relationships
Patrick Carnes; Debra Laaser, Mark Laaser; Open Hearts.
-A workbook for couples in recovery.
Mark and Debra Laaser; The Seven Desires of Every Heart.
-Written from a Christian perspective, this is a forward looking guide to repairing and rebuilding relationships.
Jennifer Schneider and Burt Schneider; Sex, Lies and Forgiveness, 3rd ed.
-A comprehensive guide for working through couple recovery from sex addiction starting
at initial discovery through the establishment of new and healthier relationship patterns.
Many examples from treatment are included.
Jennifer Schneider, Debra Corley; Disclosing Secrets:
-When, to Whom, & How Much to Reveal. A guide and workbook to appropriate and
therapeutic disclosure of sexually compulsive acting out.
Trauma
Peter Levine; Waking The Tiger.
-A non-pathologizing look at psychological trauma and how it can be addressed.
Glenn R. Schiraldi; The Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder Sourcebook.
-A comprehensive, helpful handbook for understanding and addressing trauma.
Dorothy Corkville Briggs; Your Child’s Self-Esteem.
-A guide to understand and support the development of healthy self-esteem in young children.
Tamar Chansky; Freeing Your Child From Anxiety.
-An excellent starting point for understanding and addressing anxious disorders, including compulsive behaviors, in children.
Foster Cline and Jim Fay; Parenting with Love and Logic.
-A standard on utilizing natural consequences to teach children responsibly and avoid power struggles.
Ross W. Greene; The Explosive Child.
-A resource for understanding and helping children who struggle with inflexibility, anger and ‘meltdowns.’
Mary Sheedy Kurcinka; Raising Your Spirited Child.
-A helpful, supportive book for parents of children who are more intense, energetic and sensitive.
Mitchell H. Messer; Managing Anger: A Handbook of Proven Techniques. Highly recommended for assisting children and teens.
Thomas W. Phelan; 1-2-3 Magic.
-Another helpful book on effectively disciplining children ages 2-12. This resource is also available as a video/DVD.
Carolyn Webster-Stratton; The Incredible Years.
-Sometimes hard to find, this is an excellent book on dealing with behavioral issues in children ages 3-8.
Attachment Issues
Richard J. Delaney; The Healing Power of the Family.
-Describes the relationship patterns and issues experienced by child and family in foster or adoptive homes. Includes many helpful real-life stories.
Daniel Hughes; Facilitating Developmental Attachment.
-Hughes is a leader in the field. This book is helpful for both professionals and caregivers.
Kathleen Keating; The Hug Therapy Book.
-A collection of skills and techniques to assist in developing healthy attachment.
Sexual Compulsivity and Addiction
Understanding Sexual Addiction
Patrick Carnes; Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction, 3rd Ed.
-The classic primer on sexual compulsivity and addiction.
Patrick Carnes; Don’t Call It Love: Recovery from Sexual Addiction.
-Outlines the course of recovery from initial discovery to new growth. Includes many helpful true stories.
Marnie Ferree; No Stones.
-About women healing from sexual addiction.
Mark Laaser; Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction.
-Unwanted
Jay Stringer
-Worthy of her trust
Jason Martinkus
-Another very good primer on sexual addiction written from a Christian viewpoint.
Rob Weiss; Cruise Control.
-Understanding sex addiction in gay men.
William Struthers; Wired for Intimacy.
-An understanding of brain chemistry and reactivity to sexual stimulation. Written from a Christian perspective.
Claudia Black; Deceived.
-A guide to recovery for female partners of sex addicts from a leader in the field.
Barbara Steffens; Your Sexually Addicted Spouse
-The trauma model in treating partners cope and heal from their loved ones sexual addiction.
Richard Blakenship; Spouses of Addicts Recovery and Healing, Hope for the journey
Francoise Mastroianni;Spouses of Addicts Recovery and Healing, Hope for the journey, Workbook
-A book and workbook to help the partner heal from the trauma of sexual addiction, along with personal stories, and assignments in the workbook that are expereintial and somaticatically oriented.
Internet
Patrick Carnes, David Delmonico, Elizabeth Griffin; In the Shadows of the Net, 2nd ed.
- A powerful book describing compulsive online sexual behavior and how to address it.
Includes exercises to aid in recovery.
Wendy Maltz and Larry Maltz; The Porn Trap.
-Addresses addiction to pornography.
Jennifer Schneider, Robert Weiss; Cybersex Exposed.
-Geared toward the reader who is evaluating their degree of obsession or compulsion.
Helpful evaluation and recovery exercises included.
Nancy E. Willard; Cyber-Safe Kids, Cyber-Savvy Teens.
-A positive book on addressing internet issues with children and adolescents.
Couples
John Gottman; The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.
-A direct and helpful way to look at and improve the marriage relationship.
Sue Johnson; Hold Me Tight.
-A breakthrough understanding of marital conflict based in the need for a secure, accepting relationship.
“Cuts to the chase” for many couples with years of struggle.
Terrance Real; The New Rules of Marriage.
-What you need to know to make love work.
Willard HarleyJr ; Surviving an Affair,
-Guides you step by step from the devastating blow of Infidelity to a Loving and Trusting Marriage
Emmerson Eggrichs; Love and Respect,
-The Love She Most Desires, The Respect He Desperately Needs.
Linda Dillow and Lorrain Pintus; Intimate Issues,
-21 Staightforward Anwers to Questions most Frequently asked by Christian Women on the Topic of Sex.
-Marion Solomon, Stan Tatkin; Love and War
-An intergration of neuroscience, attachment theory and relational psychotherapy
-Hold me Tight, Suesan Johnson
-7 Desires of the Heart, Mark and Debbie Laaser
Relationships
Patrick Carnes; Debra Laaser, Mark Laaser; Open Hearts.
-A workbook for couples in recovery.
Mark and Debra Laaser; The Seven Desires of Every Heart.
-Written from a Christian perspective, this is a forward looking guide to repairing and rebuilding relationships.
Jennifer Schneider and Burt Schneider; Sex, Lies and Forgiveness, 3rd ed.
-A comprehensive guide for working through couple recovery from sex addiction starting
at initial discovery through the establishment of new and healthier relationship patterns.
Many examples from treatment are included.
Jennifer Schneider, Debra Corley; Disclosing Secrets:
-When, to Whom, & How Much to Reveal. A guide and workbook to appropriate and
therapeutic disclosure of sexually compulsive acting out.
Trauma
Peter Levine; Waking The Tiger.
-A non-pathologizing look at psychological trauma and how it can be addressed.
Glenn R. Schiraldi; The Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder Sourcebook.
-A comprehensive, helpful handbook for understanding and addressing trauma.

One of my favorite resources, once a couple has stabilized to a point of feeling safe, secure, managing triggers, shame is in the shame tank where it belongs, and practicing self self soothing techniques, are they able to move to the "new marriage".
Transformation is a process......