When there is a violation, as in a threat to the body, mind and spirit and in the event of sexual addiction, experiencing the loss of the relational trauma, our bodies go into protective mode to defend and protect. Trauma can stay frozen/stuck in us for long periods of time. This can lead to symptoms such as: hyper-arousal, constriction, dissociation, freezing, hyper-vigilance, flashbacks, hyperactivity, exaggerated emotional or startle responses, nightmares, mood swings and reduced ability to deal with stress, depression, feelings of detachment, alienation and isolation, which are all trauma symptoms that you may be or can experience at any given time in the grief process.Take a look at the list below and notice where you might identify a need for "just now", in your process of awareness reach out to a safe person that is supportive of your healing process.
Five Stages of Grief - Elisabeth Kübler Ross
Interpretation
1 – Denial
Denial is a conscious or unconscious refusal to accept facts, information, reality, etc., relating to the situation concerned. It’s a defense mechanism and perfectly natural. Some people can become locked in this stage when dealing with a traumatic change that can be ignored. Death of course is not particularly easy to avoid or evade indefinitely.
2 – Anger
Anger can manifest in different ways. People dealing with emotional upset can be angry with themselves and/or with others, especially those close to them. Knowing this helps others keep detached and non-judgmental when experiencing the anger of someone who is very upset.
3 - Bargaining
Traditionally the bargaining stage for people facing death can involve attempting to bargain with whatever God the person believes in. People facing less serious trauma can bargain or seek to negotiate a compromise. For example “Can we still be friends?” when facing a break-up. Bargaining rarely provides a sustainable solution, especially if it’s a matter of life or death.
4 - Depression
Also referred to as preparatory grieving. In a way it’s the dress rehearsal or the practice run for the ‘aftermath’ although this stage means different things depending on whom it involves. It’s a sort of acceptance with emotional attachment. It’s natural to feel sadness and regret, fear, uncertainty, etc. It shows that the person has at least begun to accept the reality.
5 - Acceptance
This stage definitely varies according to the person’s situation, although broadly it is an indication that there is some emotional detachment and objectivity. People dying can enter this stage a long time before the people they leave behind, who must necessarily pass through their own individual stages of dealing with the grief.
Based on the Grief Cycle model first published in On Death & Dying, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, 1969. Interpretation by Alan Chapman 2006-2009.
